- Understanding Confidence: Confidence is a state of mind, a vibration of energy or thought wave, that we experience when we feel calm, grounded and capable to handle a task or situation. It is typically associated with familiar tasks or experiences we have mastered.
- Confidence is not inherent: Confidence is not an innate trait but developed through experience or mastery in particular areas. People are not born confident; they become confident in areas where they have gained requisite experience.
- Deficiency of Confidence: Lack of confidence is usually experienced in new or unfamiliar situations where our mastery or experience is zero or limited. Such circumstances trigger negative thoughts and anxiety, leading to a state of insecurity.
- Specificity of Confidence Issues: Confidence or its lack thereof is dependent on the context or specific area of life it pertains to. Identifying specific areas of lacking confidence is more beneficial than generically stating having low confidence.
- Competence and Mental Control over Confidence: Building confidence depends on two aspects - gaining experience and controlling one's mental state. Chronic anxiety or a predominance of negative thoughts can undermine confidence even if the necessary experience is present.
- Naturals and Confidence: Individuals seen as naturally confident often acquired necessary experience early in life, making the confidence seem inherent. While it's possible to acquire such confidence later in life, it takes longer and requires more effort.
- Role of Self-Perception: Perceiving one's competency in an area as a natural talent further solidifies confidence. Recognizing confidence as not innate but acquired through experience can prevent overgeneralization of insecurities and foster focused skill development.
- Confidence and Physical Attractiveness: Physical attractiveness often correlates with higher levels of confidence because society often praises and compliments good-looking individuals. This praise leads to a self-image of being attractive, fostering self-confidence which can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. To acquire this degree of confidence, individuals who may not conform to conventional standards of attractiveness might need to exert more effort to overcome self-deprecating beliefs.
- Influence of Environment on Confidence: The environment, including cultural influences, societal standards of beauty, media, and social experiences, heavily influences our self-image and confidence. Individuals with a weak sense of self may easily absorb negative external messages, which might undermine their confidence. To develop confidence, one needs a strong mind to reject such external influences and maintain self-belief despite criticism or negativity.
- Changeability of Self-Image: Self-image plays a significant role in confidence because it subconsciously determines our beliefs, abilities, and perception of the world. However, self-image isn't static and can be modified through various techniques, allowing for improvement in one's confidence.
- Confidence through Competence: One avenue for building self-confidence is confidence through competence. This involves taking action, mastering a skill, learning from mistakes, and building external mastery. It involves undergoing a rigorous process of building competence through failure and learning, which subsequently leads to confidence.
- Confidence through Inner Game: The other avenue for building confidence is through inner game, which involves understanding and mastering one's psychology, overcoming limiting beliefs, and reinforcing positive self-affirmations. This route requires establishing a positive self-image, eliminating subconscious limiting beliefs, and developing a strong resilience against external negative influences.
- Combination of both avenues for Confidence Building: Building self-confidence holistically requires a combination of both external and internal methods. While mastery of a skill builds competence and confidence, internal work is essential to foster a positive self-image and manage one's psychology effectively.
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